How long do you beg before you finally decide that you need to move on?  I have a boyfriend, who I plan to break up with.  Not because he has done anything wrong per se but because as much as I thought the way for me to move on was to distract myself with someone else, its not working.  Im with him and I want to be with someone else.  When Im with the someone else, I am getting calls and texts that I dont want to answer.  That in turn pisses my boyfriend off (rightly so) but somehow I just dont care.  I decided a while back what I wanted to make my life happy.  Problem is, I need a willing partner.  I have other guys texting me and emailing me, constantly asking me if I have found what I am looking for.  I have an ex-husband who swears that if I were to just come back, he'd treat me like a queen.  Although he swears he treated me like a queen before.  Funny, I felt more like a peasant girl.  I had a talk with my forbidden love a few nights ago.  In all reality, all I can see is him.  After spending the past 8 months trying to move on and trying to get my heart to let go, I have come to the conclusion that that is not going to happen.  I think I would rather live alone than to try to make it with someone else that I dont love wholeheartedly.  So now what?  First, I break up with my boyfriend.  That is a given.  But then what?  Sit around and wait while my forbidden tries to make it with this new girl?  All the while trying to pretend that it doesnt hurt?  I cant move out, that is not an option, nor do I want to.  What I want is for him to finally give in and do what his heart is telling him is right.  He told me the other night that he still loves me.  He told me he missed me while he was dating the other girl.  He told me he doesnt want to lose me again.  So why not just get rid of everyone else, and give in to our love wholeheartedly?  Why cant we just give this a chance and see where it leads?  I want to.  I want to more than anything.